Have you seen my latest guilty TV pleasure, the BBC show "What Not to Wear?" In it, these two arch fashionistas stalk some unsuspecting woman whose "friends" are trying to help her out in the wardrobe department. In one episode, they pounce on a mother of four (!) whose crime is that she looks tarty. Her bosoms are rather ample, but she's nursing. And yeah, a lot of her tops make her look like a sausage coming out of its casing, but she's recently (as in, within the past year) had a baby, so everything can't be expected to fit perfectly, can it?

Are you sweating in recognition yet? (After ten minutes I was nervous they were going to come after me!) Well, you need not, because it turns out that the things that are flattering to our dear lass are to be found in this very hot, very exclusive, very one haute mama dress! Namely, a bias cut skirt so that it grabs you in all the sexy bits of your lower body without squeezing the squishy ones, and a wide neckline for those ample bosoms. There are three fab fabrics that play off fashion's current fascination with safari chic and black lace (which can look a little "hooker-with-a-heart-of-gold," I think).

Close-up of fabrics: Black zebra with nude lining, black roses with nude lining (Linings are pulled out in this photo so you can see them)

The best part is that all the fabrics are stretch, so as you gain, lose, then gain again, this will still be the option that works best for dressy parties and weddings (oh, and a reminder for those of us who are so mommy-tracked we've forgotten how to wear anything but sweats -- cotton jersey is NEVER an option for a formal event, no matter what other nursingwear purveyors or your own bleary, sleep-deprived eyes may try to tell you.)

When you lift the top section to nurse, your real skin will be hidden under the dual pocket-style nursing openings underneath...no hiding in the bathroom next New Year's Eve!!

Designed by Roxanne, made in the good old USA by people making a living wage, in such small quantities that they could be signed and numbered. (Around 50 of each option -- compare that with the stuff you see on every other girl in the party!)

• 100% stretch polyester velvet burnout, with nylon lining
• Black zebra with nude lining
• Black roses with nude lining
• The nude lining has a hint of glitter